Last year, I read a devotional in Streams in the Desert about Paganini, a renowned violinist.
Paganini was getting ready to play in front of an audience when he realized his prized violin had been stolen. What he held in his hand was a second-hand instrument, but he played nevertheless and enraptured his audience.
The violin wasn’t special, the violinist was!
It was Paganini’s talent that coaxed beautiful music from a seemingly ordinary instrument.
Sometimes, I feel like that second-hand violin… But thankfully, I’m in the hands of a loving, compassionate Master who’s still able to coax some good music out of me.
For a woman in her 40s, I don’t have much going on. My child-rearing years are almost behind me. In a couple of years, my boys will be adults. I don’t have any great career aspirations or dreams for my future.
Imposter syndrome rears its ugly head every time I log onto LinkedIn to look at job profiles. I’m too out of the loop to apply for the IT jobs I studied for. And I don’t have the degrees to back the content marketing roles I have some experience in.
My mind constantly tells me:
- What are you doing with your life?
- You can’t really start afresh at this age!
- You don’t have much of a future to look forward to.
- You don’t have the energy to make it in the corporate world.
- You’re so far behind others who’ve progressed rapidly in their vocations.
And yet, I know deep down in my heart that God has led me to exactly where I am for a purpose.
For a season, it was to work in the IT industry. For another, it was to stay home and raise medically fragile triplets.
Then came the season of working online part-time and managing home/family the rest of the time. Following that, I became a stay-at-home, homeschooling mom.
And now, I’ve dipped my toes back into academia!
My old dreams might have crashed and burned, but what I see around me now are not ruins. I see the new foundation God laid when I obeyed Him (reluctantly, I must admit) and quit 2 separate careers.
Imposter syndrome is real, but so is the unfathomable grace of God!
His truth reminds me:
- I am a beloved child of God.
- I will never be forsaken by Him.
- His plans for my future are good.
- His grace and strength sustain me.
- The little I do is precious in His sight.
The devil can easily gain a foothold in our minds through our thoughts. But as we fill ourselves with the truth of God’s Word, the lies quiet down to a whisper.
Do you struggle with imposter syndrome as well? Perhaps you feel so worn out from all the struggles you’ve been through that you can’t even think about what’s ahead.
You may feel like a used and battered-up instrument, but in the hands of your Maker, you are just perfect for His purpose. Surrender yourself, just as you are, into the hands of the Lord. He can make beautiful music out of any instrument that’s willing to be used by Him.
It’s truly the best way to live – surrendered and ready to fulfill our Creator’s purpose for us!
Photo by Lukas Robertson on Unsplash
Oh how I feel refreshed by this. I’m currently living my career dream but sometimes I look at others and feel a type of way or beat myself up in other aspects of my life and overburden myself with worry when deep down I know I am just right where God wants me to be. Thank you for these words. God bless you.
Thank you for sharing your story, Lydia. God knows exactly where we need to be, and it’s His grace that sustains us every day.
This question runs in my mind zillion times a day! I finally end up praising and thanking god for all his goodness in my life. Biological clock and career clock is too slow but the plan and purpose of god is working. Jeremiah 29:11 his plan is with hope for the future. Thanks for sharing ur experience.
Amen! God’s timing is always perfect, Viji ❤️
Hey Sheena,
Your vulnerability and honesty in sharing your struggles resonate deeply with me. It’s incredible how you’ve drawn inspiration from the story of Paganini and beautifully intertwined it with your own journey.
You are far from being a second-hand violin; you are a masterpiece crafted by the hands of a loving and compassionate Creator. Your journey through different seasons of life, from IT to home and family care, homeschooling, and now academia, reflects the multifaceted nature of your purpose.
Imposter syndrome can be a relentless adversary, but your unwavering faith in G♡d’s plan for your life shines through your words. Remember, your worth is not defined by degrees, job titles, or societal expectations. You are valued and cherished simply for being the unique individual that you are. 🤗
As you navigate through this season of transition and uncertainty, I want to encourage you to continue leaning on your faith. Your willingness to surrender to G♡d’s will and trust in His guidance will lead you to new heights you never thought possible.
May you find comfort and strength in knowing that you are not alone in your struggles. I’ll be praying for you, that you may continue to embrace your journey with courage, resilience, and an unwavering trust in G♡d’s plan.
With lots love and admiration!
Dear Sony, it’s such a blessing to read your comment. Thank you so much for the thoughtful words of encouragement 🤗❤️